Sometimes i feel that i’ve grown up..
grown up out of the old pessimistic self,
more able to see thru different situations now and see the bright side of things.
then again
there’s still that side of me which struggles to decide who i am
to the general public
to people i care about
to people who care about me
to those i love
i dunno….
i make it a bigger deal that it actually is, i guess,
but this struggle is tiring sometimes.
i care less of what others think now, when i act,
but at the same time, you can’t just ignore the world and be who you want to be
at least i can’t.

don’t get me wrong though,
i really wish i could.
and i guess i will be.
what the hell.

life is too short to be something someone else wishes to see in you.
too short to be what you don’t fully want to be.
too short to be something you’re not 100% happy about.
and in this coming year,
i wanna strive to be myself
and do the things i enjoy doing most.
cuz when you are no longer a kid or a teenager to the world
but more or less a grown-up by age,
you have to prove that you deserve to be yourself.
Unique. Independent. 
yet Sought for.
I hope you enjoyed your 2013.
Now I am anxious for it to end.
xoxo
mandeeeee

Leave a Reply