So it’s been 28 days, and I finally feel like I am ready to share our birth story with you all,
before it becomes a bitter sweet vivid memory.
on our way to the hospital, about 30 mins after my water broke.


Our little Klayklay, aka Little Mansterr, arrived on July 7th, 2016.
On Tuesday, July 5th, we had our long anticipated ob-gyn appointment.
We had done everything we could to hang on tight since we found out that Klay’s head has been extremely low for a couple weeks now (he was turned into position at around week 33 or 34).
Our obstetrician, Dr. Kong, had planned his holiday according to our due dates, and ours wasn’t until July 17th originally, so he was to be away from June 28th till July 3rd.
Sure, there will be someone to cover for him at the hospital if I was to go into labour while he was away, but there’s nothing like having the doctor who has saw you through all these months and weeks to help you deliver in the end.
The wait felt longer than anything I’ve ever waited for, and when July 3rd came and went,
we both exhaled that breath we had held for the past couple of weeks.
Because now it meant that Klay can come whenever he’s ready and it’ll all be okay.
So when we were back at Dr. Kong’s office on July 5th, he had checked my fluid levels and size of Klay through the ultrasound. He didn’t seem to have grown all that much since we last checked, so he was estimated to be on the small side. Then I was checked to see approximately how soon we will be meeting our little guy.
To our surprise, Dr. Kong announced to Terrill and I that I was already dilated 1-2cm,
so now we are closer than ever.
I hadn’t gone out for a couple weeks before this, spending my days at home Netflix and chilling, hoping Klay will stay in and bake for a little while longer,
but we did plan to go for dinner that Wednesday night (July 6th) for Terrill’s grandma’s birthday.
So we told Dr. Kong this and he encouraged us to go,
adding, “he will probably come after your dinner.”
So we went as planned, enjoyed a good but not too filling dinner with his family,
while I consciously noted if I felt any different, any signs at all.
We went home and chilled some more, keeping what Dr. Kong said in mind,
that he may come that night, so we stayed in the living room after our showers,
did our usual “chilling” routine, where he would be on his laptop looking at cars and shoes,
and I would be lying horizontally on the couch, snoozing off.
We felt hungry by 1am and made ourselves some spicy kimchi instant noodles.
We hadn’t gone grocery shopping so that was the best we could do.
then we continued “doing nothing”, and I dozed off into a short nap.
Suddenly, I woke up feeling something gush out from below,
and I held my hand there trying to “hold it in” while rushing to the washroom,
saying, “shit shit shit shit shit it broke it broke it broke”.
That was when I knew I’ve experienced my water breaking.

Checked the clock: 3am.
no pain whatsoever though..
but we called Dr. Kong to let him know asap anyway
as I’ve read that its much more urgent if your sign of labour is having your water breaking rather than spotting.

My father-in-law came to pick us up and brought us to the hospital
(because taxi’s are too sparse at this time of night for this situation)

We got to the hospital at about 3:45am, and the nurses checked and said I was 1-2cm dilated.
So as we were signing all sorts of papers and filling out endless forms, I started to feel a bit of contractions. They were more like menstrual pain, which I don’t normally get, but they were bearable.
Terrill saw me in pain, and asked the nurse if I should head into the delivery room first (as we were still filling out forms);
After a brief pause, she replied, “She wouldn’t look like this if she was almost ready.”

We gave each other a brief look and continued finishing the documents.

After that was done, Terrill headed downstairs to fill in more forms to get me admitted into the hospital, while I was pushed in on my delivery bed into the delivery room, and was introduced to my laughing gas machine.

So with laughing gas, you’re supposed to inhale just when you start feeling the contraction coming,
and later on when you can start to anticipate the contractions, they told me I should start inhaling before it happens
(I didn’t though… That involved too much forward thinking and planning while you’re in that much pain)

Does the laughing gas help? People ask.
Well, it makes the world around you spin so you don’t really know what you’re feeling anymore.
So when contractions are too close apart (near the beginning of labour), it helps take away some of the pain.
I read that it’s like smoking weed, but since I’ve never smoked up before, I couldn’t compare the experience.
But when we get to the peak of the pain, well, let me finish the story.

So nurses came in and out every now and then to check how much I was dilated.
I was still about 3cm by the time Dr. Kong checked in on me by about 5-6am.
He suggested the shot on the bum to help me snooze off for a bit while we wait for dilation;
I agreed.

Don’t think I was able to sleep at all though,
because I remembered to pick up my laughing gas inhaler for contractions,
so I must have been awake enough at least to notice the pain.

After some time (I was unaware of time by now),
Dr. Kong said we should probably speed things up,
so he gave me a drip that would apparently cause uterine contractions,
which therefore meant that I would be in more pain in less time.


So that happened, and next thing I know, I was checked for dilation again,
and this time I was 6-7cm!
Yes, I was in more pain. For sure.

Then before I knew it, I was in SO MUCH PAIN that the laughing gas no longer helped
and I couldn’t even keep my hand on the inhaler when the contractions happened
(were they even contractions anymore? I wasn’t sure.. it just felt like inexplainable pain from hell).


and then something like a dream started,
with voices telling me not to push yet, to not scream or yell,
me being manuevered into labour position,
voices continuing to tell me not to push (which was the worst feeling ever when you have a baby trying to get itself out into this world but you need to hold it in),
and then hands shoving the laughing gas inhaler in my face and forcing my two hands on it to hold it in place..
from then on, all I was inhaling was laughing gas.
The pain was slightly lighter, and the dream continued.

After what seemed like forever (but apparently it happened really quickly),
I was asked to push when they said to.
4-5 pushes later, the baby was out, and really soon,
I heard the first cry of my baby boy.

Tears rushed out and I found myself sobbing.
The tears came so naturally, and I found myself feeling overwhelmed with happiness.
Having waited 9 months to meet our little bundle of joy, it was so surreal to finally know what he looks like.
But it was so much more than just that,
way more than I can put into words.
All in all, it was the best feeling in the world.
And everything leading up to it was so worth it.

From that moment on, our world had changed,
in the best way possible.

in my bed, in my room, after all the drama UvU

Today, four weeks later,
I’m, we’re, still in awe in this beautiful bundle of cuteness we have created together,

even if he may cry a little too much sometimes.


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